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The Mystical Garden Of Napocor.

Once upon a time there was a mystical garden that lies in the heart of an unknown island. People were afraid to go near in that mystical garden because it looked so majestic and it was so bright. The light that it produced was enough to make the unknown island and the nearby island make it seems like they’re on fire. But since no one was brave enough to go near, the light that it produced remains in the mystical garden alone and the whole island was pitched dark.

Until one day, a brave man came along. He approached the mystical garden and asked “can you give me some of your light?”. “Why would i give you my light?”, asked the mystical garden. “I can used it in my everyday life. Your light will help me brighten my surroundings even at night. I can still work at night with the help of your light. Your light will make my life more easier”, answered the man. The brave man seems to convinced the mystical garden that it did agree to give him some of its light.

A few more days later some people also approached the mystical garden and they told the same thing. The mystical garden was so happy because people were not afraid anymore. It was so happy that it didn’t notice that slowly its light started to run out until there’s only one ray of light left for it. The mystical garden felt so sad. It was so sad that its light were fading out.

Then one day the brave man came back. “Hello my mystical garden friend. Why are you so sad?”, the brave man asked. The mystical garden was hesitant to answer. “Your light was fading”, said the brave man. “I only have one ray of light left for me. I gave you some but why do you have to tell other people about it?”, the sad mystical garden asked. The brave man walked in the heart of the garden and said “yes, i did tell people that you gave me your light. I told them because i also want to make their life easier. I want them to have the kind of life that i have because of what you have given me. You’re sad because you only have one ray of light? Why don’t you try to look around you and tell me what do you see”. The mystical garden did what the brave man told. It looked around and rain started to fall because the mystical garden was crying. “You have one ray of light left but if you look around you all the people in different islands have your light and it was so bright that we can almost light the entire sky. You shouldn’t be sad because you’re not alone anymore. By giving us your light you scattered hope in our life and now we can be a mighty light because we are one.”

The mystical garden realized what the brave man said and from then on they all live brightly ever after.

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I am depress. (A phrase that is very hard to say)

I don’t know how depression looks like to others. I don’t know if showing to people that you’re strong and happy while deep inside you just want to shut everything out is a sign of depression to them. If despite of trying you’re best you still feel like you’re worthless even if people compliment you. If when you look at the mirror you see an empty reflection. You keep on telling others that “you are enough” but you can’t say those words to yourself. You always think that you’re nothing. You sometimes hear your inner self shouting “die”.

Because for me this is what depression looks like.

People will say that No it’s not depression. You’re just making things up. It’s all in your head. Instead of receiving warm words from them this is what they get. This is the reality. People don’t care at all. If you’re not beneficial to them why would they care? You’re getting sick because of too much stress at work but when you take a leave people will say that you shouldn’t prioritize yourself. People with depression needed a space to breathe. Their thoughts are suffocating them to the point that the only option to stop it is to take away their own life. Don’t judge them. Don’t tell them what to do because God knows how many times that idea crosses their mind. Don’t listen half-heartedly; don’t waste their time opening up to you.

We don’t need to experience it in order for us to understand them. Depression is a serious mental problem. It is not something that we should ignore.

My spark and the flame.

What’s the difference between spark and flame?
I can talk to you about anything that pops up in my crazy head. I can tell you about the smallest thing that happened in my entire day. I can be who I am without the fear of being judge. I don’t need to hide the real me because I know you’ll not run away after seeing the naked truth. There’s a spark between us. Little sparks that gives tiny light just like stars.

Then he came. Someone who set my world on fire. No words. Nothing to talk about. I was blinded by the flame of his fire. I was amazed how someone can create such beautiful flames. At some point I  want to touch it. I wanna know what it feels like being near him. Will it warm my cold heart? Will it brighten the darkest day of my life just like the sun does?

My mind is confused but not my heart. All this time I know what my heart wants. Will it be the flame or the spark? 🙂

Random Crazy Thoughts of Love.

The love I have to give isn’t the kind of love you see in a movie.

It’s not always hugs and kisses or flowers and chocolates.

The love I have to give is unique in so many aspects.

It is written in between the words I Love you.

 

The kind of love I have is simple but deep.

In order for someone to understand it,

They have to close their eyes and let their heart see it.

Our eyes can fool us but not our hearts.

 

I love seeing a clear blue sky in the morning.

The calmness of clouds and the broad stretch of horizon let my heart at ease.

Then rain makes me sad.

Raindrops make me feel as if the sky is crying.

Who wouldn’t love the stars and moon?

The stars and moon will still shine so bright no matter how dark the night is.

I love the month of April and May because I know I will once again see my eternal love.

Fire Trees!Yes, Fire trees the kind of tree that only blooms during those months. The red flowers of this tree are like flames, the kind of flame that I would dare to touch.

Old books make me nostalgic.

I love reading those kinds of book because it let my mind travel back in time.

 

You see, everything I love can be seen by naked eyes but I didn’t love those because I can see it.

I fell in love with those because after appreciating the beauty they possess,

I close my eyes and cherish them in my heart.

I used my heart to love them even more.

And this is the kind of love I have to give.

I will use my heart to understand and love even more.

This kind of love can travel through distance.

I don’t need eyes to see or hands to touch.

My heart can prove if this Love is true or not.

People will say that it is a foolish act to use your heart without using your mind

but for me I’d rather live a life with lesson from my mistakes than a life without mistakes because I didn’t follow my heart.

I don’t care if people will never understand why I fell in love in the first place.

Even if they think that it’s all the same for me it will always be uniquely different.

 

The next time I fall ❤️

The next time I fall in love,

I don’t want to fall at the idea of love.

I will limit my imagination so it won’t be another infatuation.

No more what if’s so that I will not be bothered on what could have been.

The next time I fall in love,

I will trust you enough.

I will trust my heart and hope that finally this is the love I want.

No more trust issues and insecurities, just love.

The next time I fall in love,

Happiness will reach my inner soul

I will be happy enough knowing that finally you’re here

No more leaving nor running away and I’ll do whatever i can to make you stay.

The next time I fall in love,

I will choose to love you and not in the idea of loving you

While waiting for you to come,

I will prepare myself to be right for you.

I don’t need to search for the Right one because I know if it’s time for us to meet,

You will be just right for me.

Ang tunay na Ikaw sa kwento ng Ikaw at Ako. 

Ang dami ng sanga ng kwento ng ikaw at ako.

Kwentong simula at dulo lang ang meron.

Walang gitna dahil hindi pa nga nagtatagal ang simula, tinatapos ko na agad ito.

Ano ba talagang meron sa kwento ng ikaw at ako?

Sino nga ba ang Ikaw sa kwentong ito?

Sa dami ng bersyon ng istoryang ito bakit hindi ko magawang ilahad kung sino nga ba ang tinutukoy ko.

Ikaw yung parte ng buhay ko na hindi ko magawang ikuwento.
Takot akong aminin na ako ang dahilan bakit natapos ang kwento ng Ikaw at Ako.

Pano ko nagawang bitawan ang mga pangarap natin at tuluyang tumalikod palayo sa istoryang ito.

Ako yung umalis, nangiwan.
Iniwan sa ere yung taong walang ibang mahal kung hindi ako.

Pero, sa akin nag marka yung sakit na ibinigay ko sayo.

Apat na taon kong dinala.
Natakot akong ibigay ang puso ko sa iba.

Minulto ako ng kasalanan ko sayo.

Hindi ko nagawang patawarin ang sarili ko.

Apat na taon ang lumipas,
Nakita kita masaya ka na. 

Wala ng bakas ng sakit na dinulot ko sayo.

Ngiting nagbigay laya sa puso ko para maging masaya na muli.

Salamat Popoy
Pwede ko na ngayong lagyan ng tuldok at isara ang libro ng Ikaw at Ako.

Ang simula ng wakas.


Paano nga ba natapos kung wala naman simula?Bakit naubos ang bawat salita?Saan ko nga ba sisimulan ang kwentong tinapos na?

Alam ko kung saan ako lulugar sa buhay mo. Abot tanaw, abot kamay pero hindi pwedeng manatili sa tabi mo. Hindi pwedeng sabihin ang mga katagang “Mahal kita” dahil kung sa iba ito ang simula, sa kwento natin ito ang magwawakas.

Tikom ang bibig, pigilan ang puso. Mga paalalang ulit ulit na tumatakbo sa isip ko tuwing ikaw ang kasama ko.

Gusto kong simulan ang umaga na ikaw ang kasama pero bago matapos ang gabi ramdam ko na walang pag-asa. 

Ito na nga ata ang wakas ng sinimulan ko. Sasambitin ang mga katagang tatapos sa kwento ng ikaw at ako. Mahal kita, yan ang totoo.

There would be days like this where you can feel the pain within your veins. As if someone is pricking your whole body with tiny needles. You told him it doesn’t hurt at all because that’s the truth but a day like this would come. You’ll never see it coming. After it ended you go on with your life. Walking straight ahead without looking back. You side glanced at your shoulder but you just shrugged it off and keep on walking. One warm sunny day like today will come where you’ll feel like your whole world is falling apart. Your strong heart will wave the white flag and for one day you’ll admit to yourself that you’re defeated. Yes, the longing and emptiness that you hide to yourself and to the whole world finally overpowers you.